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Prisoners of War

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Original Work: Impromptu Poem

Prisoners of War

We are the prisoners of war,
of a war that we cannot win, 
but yet are still waging.

We are all prisoners, 
and yet we are free to go.
There is a loophole,
that no one seems to know.

This is a war against Time,
and Time will ultimately win.
But these people!
They simply don't believe.

Entrapped, encased.
Bound, enslaved.
By an abstract term that 
no others relate.

At the cross-road,
leave the crowd and go.
They are heading towards the war,
one that continues forever more.

Musings 1 and 2

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[Guest Post by Friend]

Musings No. 1

you streak past as a silver shadow would
i speak, yet it makes not what it should
we seek love as only statues could
so meek, the drive of our hearts goes bold

see the fleece that frames your face
hear the silence that fills our days
touch the scars that lost their ways
taste the fears that knot my lace

does it end for naught?
will i forever be in drought?
can the future be forth brought?
or will us forever be en route?



Musings No. 2

i may only see you in red, green and blue;
but we run deeper than the wires do.
we converse about the sun, the birds and the bees;
to our hearts we exchange the keys.
my eye lingers from your name to the sign of grey,
till the circle comes round, my fingers are at bay.
in this entangling web there lies the gap,
through which my soul draws its sap.
every low note reminds me of
the empty life before it
and God's present of you.

A Poem of Heartbreak

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[Note: NOT written by me, I copied it from a book but forgot the poet's name.]

(inhale)
tears begin to flood my face like a cup left under a
running faucet well after the water has reached the rim,
my heart leaping to my throat,
getting caught,
squeezing caught,
squeezing,
twisting,
tearing.
My throat contracting around the emotions that threathen
to leap up and out of my lips,
my stomach,
rumbling,
wrestling,
knotting.
My hands quiver as I reach up to blot the tiny teardrops,
leaving footprints down my cheeks.
The path that awaits me,
suddenly seem like a pilgrimage.
One foot,
next foot,
step,
step.
I see you. (I see her)
You smile,
I smile. (she leaves)
You ask how I am. (I lie)
I reply that I'm fine. (Even though my heart has just crept into my mouth and is jumping up and down my tongue like an Olympic diver waiting to hit the water.)
I wanted to say that I miss you,
let you know that every moment I'm awake I think of you.
I want you to know that I miss your arms,
your smile,
your lips. [writer's note: errrr, whatever]
I want you to know that (I'm incomplete)
my body hurt,
my soul bleeds.
I ask how you are (hoping that you will tell me what I want to hear)
you reply, (your answer not including you miss me, that you miss my arms, my lips, my touch.)
my eyes attempt to strip you down to your soul.
they got lost, (but finding their way back into reality when they graze over the [ever-fading] hickey, just above the shirt she bought you.)
My heart leaps off the end of my tongue,
wanting you to see the way you have hurt me
wanting you to hurt the same way.
It falls to the ground. (She calls you.)
You hastily said goodbye (as you trotted over to her)
stomping,
squishing,
mutilating,
my vulnerable, fallen heart (not even pausing long enough to scratch if off your shoe like a discarded piece of gum.) 
she wraps her arms around your neck,
brings her lips to yours... (your ears turn red [writer's note: are we talking about Hermione and Ron here?])
people pass, as if I don't even exist, (I want to cry scream and shout.)
I want someone to find my heart,
bring it back,
piece it together.
I turn away,
hoping that one day, it won't hurt (as much)
and hoping that I will be able to call ou
and have you come over to me,
and be able to buy you shirts that match your eyes (and leave that tell-tale hickey, just above the collar)
and will still be able to make your ears turn red from the friction of our lips. [WN: o_o]
I walk away,
knowing my heart will not follow.
(exhale)

Hectic Week of School

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Mood: Tired, somewhat disenchanted and hurt
Weather: Relatively warm and stuffy

It had been a hectic and pretty terrible week at school; the lessons are starting normally and after the refreshing change from the energy-zapping dance practices, it just sank into this sort of tiring and boring stupor.

My class? I am in a love-hate-relationship with my class as Smelly puts it, because she is in one too with her class. I laugh remembering Smelly saying that there is apparently this rich boy in her class that is like the son of the Fareast Organization and all the girls in the class (excluding Smelly, because Snape does not like guys haha) are trying to catch his attention and also longed to be paired with him. Upon hearing that Sluggy and I were like "whaaaaaaaaat are you serious, why they so no shui zhun..."

I like several people in my class because I think they are quite nice and friendly, but there are also this extremely dao and black-faced-all-day group that I do my best to stay far away from, and recently I have been trying to minimize the number of words I say in class and to ANYONE in class so that I can remain safely and hopefully obscure.

Sometimes I think I speak so little that I wonder if my voice will disappear from disuse.

Currently, the top three people I like in my class are:
  1. Denyse
  2. Clarissa
  3. Jun Jie
The others are like, I either don't really know them (I don't know about 5-6 people's names, and I have to address them as "eh") or they belong to the DAB (Dao-and-blackfaced) Group mentioned earlier and I had no wish of getting into their way.

Denyse and Clarissa are pretty awesome because they are both nice in different ways and I always do try to see the good points in people and appreciate it and try my best to overlook the bad points. Ah well I don't try to make myself sound saintly, but if I do sound that way, it means that I must be like that in person right...haha just kidding.

Anyways, I thought Monday was one of the worst days, because I felt lousy through and through both mentally and physically at school and there was the disgusting PE which I hate so much. We had to take height and weight and I am still like 165cm but my weight is like pretty terrible. Yes yes, my weight is nasty and I know it, so I am off to run later hahahas. It makes me feel morbidly fat each time I see how fat I am, and the idea of becoming a young killer whale scares me witless too.

In any case you are curious why I am blogging despite being so busy, it is because I am too burnt out to do anything now and so I shall blog, then go jog and then come up and do work. It is very demoralizing to work hard and realize that you are lagging behind all the lessons, and sometimes my mind just refuse to cooperate with me when working.

Tuesday was the only day I got home at 5pm, the earliest timing. All the other days I reached home at seven, and that is like freaking sad because I am bloody tired by then and it took every ounce of my self control to not plonk myself down on bed and sleep till the next morning. But Tuesday, I recalled that a lot of terrible things happened to me, so I reached home in a dejected and depressed mood, and zombied around till pretty late before I started working.

I remembered one of the mornings, Bryan came to join me, Sluggy and Smelly S. in the morning and truth be told, there was this lingering sense of awkwardness that pretty much refused to go away, but fortunately for us all, Bryan isn't an awkward person (unlike the people in my OG, damn bloody awkward) and yeah it went pretty well. (FYI: this is a different Bryan from the one in primary school, kays, don't be confused.)

Oh yeah I remembered on Tuesday, Bryan and I went to Bukit Timah Plaza's Popular for him to get notebooks for his class since he was appointed physics rep. It was quite fun to go there because school is honestly quite suffocating and BTP was quite near school and in the direction of my travel, so I wasn't too disturbed. The Popular there is like freaking warm and I sweated a bucket inside Popular, phew~~~

Wednesday Apollo and Athena went to OCS (Officer Cadet School) and I was really quite excited because I watched "Ah Boys to Men" a bit of it, and the show is pretty funny and a bit lame too, and going there made me super high all the way. Denyse and Clarissa were obsessed with playing lateral thinking on the bus there, and I think half my brain cells died trying to figure out the puzzles. One difficult one went like that:

"A body is discovered in a park in Chicago in the middle of summer. It has a fractured skull and many other broken bones, but the cause of death was hypothermia."
So we were supposed to keep asking questions to Clarissa, the game master and she can only reply yes or no, but the thing was so hard that she had to keep giving everyone hints. I remember I was so tired with playing it that I opted out, and I would read the solution with Clar and feel blissfully knowledgeable while smirking at the ignorance of the others, ahahaha.

On our way off the bus, we met this group of boys from class 75 that was also playing lateral thinking, and Clarissa got excited because she just loves that game and she asked them for their question. At this point I would have to be irrelevant and point out there one of the boys (their gamemaster) looked a bit like what G.O. (from Mblaq) would have looked like as a kid. Don't know who is G.O.? Here he is:


Okay lar, not so good looking, but the features are more or less the same and I had pointed it out to Dol once and she agreed with me, so I think I am not so off-point yet.

Main point here is that their lateral thinking is really quite hard. It was something like:
"A naked person was found dead in the desert. He does not have any clothes on and there was a used/broken match beside him."
So all of us were like guessing and guessing, and you have to listen to G.O.'s friends (haha omg such a easy way to refer to the gamemaster there), they were asking things like:

"Is the person a woman?"

It went on and on till I asked, "Did the person fall from the sky?" and G.O. went like "YES!" and then he was all suspicious that we knew the answer because me and Clarissa thought that it was the same as our Chicago question and we were like exclaiming happily....till he said that the guy didn't fall from the plane and we were like awww, too bad.

OCS was really super fun! I thought all the officers inside would be very strict, stern, humorless and maybe even shout at us, but they were so nice and friendly and humorous that I was surprised. The one in charge of our group was really cute and funny, and he wasn't so tall or buff, so he was less intimidating imo, and yeah, he kept coming over to join our group as we played lateral thinking, and I could sort of tell that he didn't get it and must be thinking like, "Lord what are these girls doing..." even though he just smiled sweetly and all.

Best part? We get to hands-on on some of the guns and it was really cool because we can fire empty shots for fun. It smelled pretty bad I must say, and it made me appreciate and prefer my air-rifles and pistols so much more because they don't give off acrid smoke after each fire.

There was a station where you can hold the guns for fun and I was going to try it when the NS person whipped out his camera and I was like, "No no no, I don't want a photo thanks!" so he put it away and I tried to looked through the focus and aim, and he just took out his camera again and took a picture anyways. I was like *Edvard Munch's The Scream* face made and he looked so happy with himself that is was rather amusing.

Oh at the start Junjie was asking everyone for their bread rations because he didn't have any lunch, so 5 of us sitting near him gave him our bread rolls and he was like, munch munch munch on like 3 rolls, one after another at one go that he looked like a food-deprived squirrel cramming its mouth full of nuts. So funny haha, I am like trying to amuse myself all the time because life is so boring.

We ended quite late, at 6pm or so, and I wanted to go home with Sluggy but Sluggy left in her classmate's car, so I left with my class to take the school bus back to school and then back home. I got Jeremy to call me on the way so that I could ask him Chem prac and about library and before that I annoyed Theng Fong senseless with maths. See, that's called time saving aahaha.

After that, I was tying my shoelaces at the bus stop when I saw a new gleaming double decker coming into the station and I shrieked for Junjie to see the number lest it is my bus. It was like 157 and I was like, shoot shoot shoot, my bus!!! And guess what it turned out that he took the same bus and he lived SEVERAL BLOCKS away from me, and I was all like, "WHAT??? I HAVE NEVER SEEN YOU IN MY LIFE!!!"

It was quite fun to talk to him on the bus because he reminded me of pragmatic Sluggy and we were talking about how we had the disadvantage in literature so we sort of wanted to ask for consultation, which he was pretty eager about. That is good, I told him to tell me when he goes so that I can learn too, and I was getting really worried about lit because I just couldn't see anything you see. Like the underlying meaning and all, the things I write are like super superficial that I can't even.... Okay we talked a lot about other things but I am too lazy to type, so I will leave it at that.

Thursday had lunch with Bryan and the food we bought was like damn disgusting that we threw away most of the food (suddenly the contrast between Bryan's "Just throw lar, damn gross" and Junjie's "No no cannot waste food!" comes to mind and it is so freaking hilarious hahaha). Friday had lunch with Denyse and Denyse is super cute and sweet and it is comfortable to be around her because she was humorous but not jarring, and she makes me feel at ease.

I met Leon twice in the school, both times I didn't seem to see him because I was absorbed in my own thoughts, and he waved at me the first time during Thursday break, and I didn't see him, and Bryan was like, "HEY HE WAS WAVING AT YOU!" and I was like, "WHO??" So it turned out to be Leon and I guess if I am Leon I would feel pretty hurt, like gosh, did you just daoed me? The worse thing was that on Friday he waved at me again and I still didn't see him because I was still absorbed in my own thoughts, and this time he stopped and waved his hand in my face and I was like startled before going "HIIII!!!!!!!" He was so exasperated he was like, "Aiyo wave to you each time you cannot see one is it? Always never wave back!"

Poor, adorable Leon and his funny statements. He is worth 10 times of any flirts out there who think they are so great when they are not. Hrmpph.

Friday Sluggy and I had the CenTAD mini project interview, and it was not so hard, since Sluggy was there and I let her answer most because I suck at interviews and well, I think she did brilliantly. Must have been pretty impressive for the interviewers too, I should think.

We went home later feeling so happy because it is FRIDAY AND WE WERE LIBERATED!

I told her that I felt like we were walking out of Azkaban and I felt this fierce rush of joy pumping into my veins.

Was so tired that when I went home, I slept till nine, woke up and slacked till 2am talking to Bryan and others online and went back to sleep. Woke up at 10am today, sighs.

Shall go and jog now, and then come back to do work!

Catch you all later then!


Go, if you wish to

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Go, if you wish to 

Go, if you wish to.
I can't and won't hold you back.
I won't be the shackle to tie you down;
or the anchor that have you bound.
Go, and I won't stop you.

Go, if you wish to.
The world is vast and my grip is
Fast 
but not enough.
I will let go if I have to.
My frail grip, it won't hold,
I have no wish to do so.

Go, if you wish to.
Go, and don't turn back.
Leave, and don't look back.
Spread your wings and soar 
through the shattering night sky,
I will see you,
but you won't.

Go, if you wish to.
Depart and don't come back.
What is the point in you staying,
if I love you and you never loved me back?

[Original Work on Live & Dictate]

Side Notes:
Do you all like this poem? It sort of sprang to my head while I was showering (haha showering is such an inspiration) and I think that is poem is inspired by both Pablo Neruda's "Tonight I can write the saddest lines" and by the Victorian period, where women were seen as subservient to men and if their husbands wanted to have affairs and leave them, the women can only bless them and take a step back. 

A rather sad, and melancholic poem in my opinion, of a person who had held on so hard to the person she loved only to realised that the lover is leaving her, presumably for someone else. Do you all feel the melancholy and the after-calm in the lines of the poem? It feels like the narrator had come to terms with this separation that she knows for sure will come and she seems to have let go by telling the other party that she would let go if she had to because there is no way she could ever hold him to her should he not love her back.

Will appreciate your feedback on the poem! (:

Post Orientation Party and Others

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Bwahahahaha finally orientation has ended today!

Weather: Rainy, but rain stopped by tonight so it was between warm and cool. :D
Mood: Tired, but relieved and relatively happy and cheerful

Most important thing of all, Phiephie, Wennie, Chinny and I have gotten ourselves new names (partly for this blog) because Wennie had the habit of calling people the way I call them on my blog, so sad for us, people all know our nicknames and it is time to change!

Phiephie is now officially Sluggy/Sluggish.
Chinny is now known as Sleepy Chin.
Wennie, hehehe, we sort of called her Smelly Snape but she is in the midst of holding a protest, so there might be a further change. :D
Me? Sluggy gave me the name of Llama. (I guess there are things worse than a llama, like a YAK. -_-)

Anyway today we had like Post Orientation Party, aka POP, and I was feeling so apprehensive yesterday because I knew today was going to be such a tiring day, and I don't like tiring days, haishh. But in the end, I guess it was relatively okay, and in fact relatively fun because me and Sluggy were hoboing together and neither of us could remember any of the dance from SODACHE so all was well.

POP was rather funny, because people keep forming choo-choo-trains and going round and round, so we just randomly stick ourselves onto an existing HUMAN CENTEPEDE (ahahaha gross much) and chugged our way around. It wasn't easy okay! There were like trains everywhere and I couldn't hold onto the person in front of me (coz I so gentle, don't want to grab hard) and the train kept snapping at where I was. Weepy-weep-weeps. I think I am a bit high here.

I thought everyone did a fantastic job dancing and even though I wasn't part of my Fac's dance (coz I missed too many sessions, so too bad), it was still pretty cool, and Ares won the POP in the end. Their dance was like super professional and synchronized, and I was like how did they manage to be so synchro! So pro. Their dance included loads of dubstep and house music I think, not very good with music genres myself hehe, and it was really very cool.

Jumpy kept imitating the calls of a specific type of bird today, don't ask me what bird, I also don't know the bird name, but the call is super familiar coz that species of bird caws very very LOUDLY like this:

Eeeeeee-yoh!

 
Gah, oh no that was a lousy onomatopoeia on my behalf, it sounded like a donkey's braying instead. Haish. But Jumpy did an awesome job of cawing and she was trying to teach me and Sluggy to caw too so that we can caw at the most inappropriate moments like when the Fac Com is demanding for silence. Imagine that:

Fac Com: SHhhhhhhh everyone!
Jumpy: eeeeeee-yoh!
Me: Eeeeeeee-yoh!
Sluggy: eeeeeeee-yoh!
Everyone: *stares*

Okadie, I can't really remember much of the most of the day because it was so much dance practice and I didn't have to pratice, so I did most of my homework allocated to me, went through my lecture notes and slept. I drooled into my jacket, omigod so gross, I have to wash it this weekend. :P Some more it was drizzling then and somebody turned on all the ceiling fans and it was like so chilly at the class bench there, brrrrr.

Speaking of coldness, this morning on the bus, the bus was so freaking freaking cold that I wonder if the bus was supposed to ferry polar bears around (haha lame) and when I departed, a sheen of condensation formed on my plastic file and the droplets rolled around. Brrrrr.....coldness.

Oooh and today me and Sluggy hoboed together most of the time, even though I am starting to like my class, I still think it would be wise for me to keep a safe distance from most people except for Denyse because being volatile as I am, who knows I may just blow up someday and irritate the hell of everyone eh?

The best thing about my class is that they don't really care whether you are highing with them or simply sitting by the side doing your own work, and mostly nobody bothers/cares what I was doing. I guess a few "OMG YOU SO MUG!" or "WAH WHY YOU DOING WORK?" every now and then is pretty fine, because it shows that I have still failed to be transparent as I had wished to be, and I should work harder in trying to camouflage myself into the class bench. :D

Oh I suddenly thought of a very funny thing, and it is regarding the Bio Notes distribution. Yesterday, our class monitor/rep, Theng Fung probably passed everyone their notes/tutorials/etc but I wasn't around, so I didn't get them, so at night I was asked via Whatsapp if I took the Biology Revision Package instead of tutorial. I was like, um no I didn't, in fact I took nothing at all. Then another classmate, Giogi replied that she was the one who took the Biology Revision Package by accident, and I was like okie, this matter is settled then. But guess what?

This morning Theng Fung asked me again if I took the Biology Revision Package and I was like O.o and said that I already said that I didn't take any of the 3 things we were supposed to take and he is like hmmm and walked away. So I thought tadaaa end! Aha...

During lunch, Theng Fung asked me if I took the rest of the notes that I had to take, and I said yeah I had. Then he asked me AGAIN if I had taken the Biology Revision Package and I was like really quite speechless, like "Grrrr I told you twice already that I didn't take it and some more someone already told you that she took it, rawr you sotong!" But then I managed to try to make myself think in the other way (I am trying to be nice nowadays): "Ahhh, I should be glad that we have such a responsible CT Rep, and I should do my part to aid him in his tireless hunt for the missing Biology Revision Package! Don't be mean, llama Kira!" So I sort of opened my file and checked in front of him, and let him checked too so that he can sleep well today knowing that I didn't take the notes. .__. Aigooo.

Ooh and here is my class photo that I downloaded from Facebook if you are interested:

Class Photo
Haha, we only have three boys in our class (one of the boys here is a senior) and 20 girls (a few in German when photo was taken), so uh the female hormones a bit the high. Oh and if I am not wrong, we already have a couple in our class since I see them together 24/7, but I don't really care since it doesn't affect me and my work anyways :D

Oh and one last thing, recently I have been so self-conscious because of this one horrible terrible idiotic pimple on my face that is turning purple like oh-god-why-someone-please-kill-me. I think part of it is my fault, because when I just had the pimple that was not yet purple, I was all conscious over it and tried to make it invisible by putting tinted moisturizer on it and sometimes even dabbed foundation. I think it worsened the dumb pimple and so in retaliation, it has gotten progressively more vicious and eventually turning a nasty shade of purple and making me feel like I am disfigured. 

Oh my sweet lord, I can't even find the courage to raise my head nowadays (yes it is that serious) and I am praying for the pimple to go away soon or it is going to ruin my life. I have been lathering tons of acne cream on it each time after I rinse or wash my face, hence smothering that evil purple pastille that is plotting to take over my skin and hopefully killing it well. I do see some improvement in it, and I personally hope that it will disappear soon (hopefully over this weekend) or my whole tube of Acne Medicated cream will be all gone, wasted on ONE pimple. .__.

[Haha I can't believe I am so drama over one pimple, traalallalala~~]

Ahhh so tired, I don't want to get panda eyes this year, so I think I will end here and go sleep....and maybe do some reviews that I have been putting off for so long tomorrow hahahas (:

To all my 200+ daily readers that come back frequently to read this even though updates are so rare nowadays, I am really grateful to you guys and hope that you had enjoyed reading this as much as I had enjoyed typing! Feel free to drop me messages (that are not spam, I hate those GRRR) in the comments below or in the tag board, and introduce yourself, whatever. You can email me too, if you want, my email in the sidebar. :3

Promise that I will try to do at least one review this week end (probably a Nuffnang post too) and keep reading! 

Thanks, love you all and take care. (:






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Sorry about lack of posts :O
Will try to be hardworking and update on Saturday, because school is getting more hectic.
Someday I fear that this blog will becoming dormant, sighs.

Have bigger, brighter eyes with DuffyBeau contacts!

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Sponsored Review

Don't you wish to have bigger, brighter eyes like the girl in the poster below?

Yup, the key to having bigger and brighter eyes nowadays is all about wearing big eye contacts! You can have the best eye make up in the world, but even make up cannot change one thing:

Small pupils 
that is a result of smaller eyes

So worry not people, I have the exact solution to solve your woes of having dull, lifeless eyes in a painless, fuss-free and SUPER CONVENIENT WAY! 

Vivieye 18.8mm Black colored contacts

These contacts not only make your pupils so much bigger and better for you to enlarge your eyes even further with proper make-up, it also brightens up your eyes, giving it the much sought after shine in the eyes!


You see what I mean about the contacts being able to give you brighter eyes? They reflect light very well!



Okay I am a little uncomfortable with having my face appearing on my blog too much, so I sort of crop out only my eye area to show you all the difference.


Sorry, the photo isn't very clear because I couldn't get good lighting, so the photo ended up very noisy.

Experience
1. Comfort
I think when it comes to wearing contact lenses, the most important thing would be that it has to be comfortable, since you are wearing them in the most vulnerable and easily-hurt part of you body, the EYES. This is actually my first time trying contacts, and you can ask Shi Hui (ireviewuread.tumblr.com) that I was so worried about having to put things into my eyes that I almost for a second wanted to back out of this review. But then I got the lenses, and I mustered all my courage to place the contacts into my eyes.

To my greatest surprise, the contacts are really really comfortable once you have slide them into your eyes, and you can barely feel like there's anything there at all. This is saying something considering that I am wearing contacts for the first time, and I have no experience with contacts and whatsoever, and this contacts are slightly larger than other contacts I have seen, and yet they feel great!

2. Enhancing the eyes
I realized that there is only so much that make up can do to make your eyes bigger, and certainly, having a larger and brighter (more watery) pupil will make you look younger and more energized. I mean look at babies! They have such bright and clear pupils that make them look so cute!

So these pair of lenses does a fantastic job in enlarging the pupils and at the same time, giving your eyes a natural looking shine that make you look so much more alluring! Great contacts!

3. Clarity
I never knew that coloured contacts had DEGREES too, so when Duffy asked me for my degrees, I was like "Huh?" before coming to my senses. I love the fact that the moment I put these on, I no longer need my glasses, which means that I have big clear eyes that are unhindered by unflattering objects like glasses right!

This also means that we girls can use as much false lashes as we want, along with mascara. :3

Oh and in case any of you are wondering, you won't see the pattern on the lenses when you put them on, you see everything as per usual like clearer than ever!

4. Service
I think Duffybeau has done a fantastic job in selling a HUGE variety of lenses. She is efficient in handling the orders and sends them really fast. Not only so, she is also really nice and made sure that we have made the right choices before confirming the order and sending them to us as soon as possible.

I also think that her prices are really average and affordable, and I would definitely buy contacts from her again if I have the need for them. Overall, awesome and friendly service along with great contact lenses, jang jang jang 5/5 rating! :D


I know you all are excited to try out contact lenses too, so you can head over to her facebook page, add her as a friend, and then starting ordering contacts from her! Currently she is taking a break for CNY and she will let us know once pre-ordering starts!

A Poem for A friend

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**Please note that this is only a poem written for my own self entertainment and for a friend who needs to hand in his assignment. No underlying meaning is intended and no satire is meant. The farmers or fruits are not representative of anyone or anything at anywhere, please just read the poem at the surface meaning and enjoy it. (:
 

They, the people who cast their shadows upon our form.
They, the farmers who let rain fall when they call.

Oh, pick the best fruits and shove aside the rest!
And turn not a blind eye towards the best.
Heap fertilizers, and nutrients, upon those that bloom,
and then cast aside those that struggle to grow.

"The Best!!!" they cried to passer-bys, "The very best, our fruits are!"
"Throw in your seeds and seedling too, for we shall grow them into radiant blooms."
And that the people did believe.

But then, the swarms of locusts did invade
and that, only the luckiest plants survived.
The wilted ones, cast aside, deep into the shadows of chilling doom.

"Help!" begged the ones who gave the seeds, "Help our plants to bloom!"
They however shook their head and refused to lift the gloom.
"Alas!" they sighed, "We aren't able to help every seed to grow."

The rejected seeds are cast back to the crowd, now stuck halfway between:
Then and Now
Up and Down
But the farmers, with huge grins on their faces, continued down the path, shouting,
"The Best! Our fruits are the very best!"


Orientation Day 2,3 & 4

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Orientation Day 4
Weather: Wet & Gloomy, but I like it, fits my mood
Mood: Terrible and morbid

I think I would start with today first and then backtrack all the way to the second day (which was also pretty horrible) of orientation.

In summary, today is a terrible terrible day, and I have the feeling that more of such days are going to come unless I choose to do either of the following two things:

  • I accept that things cast in stones cannot be changed, so I might as well change myself and my thinking.
  • I accept that the things cannot be changed, and therefore sink myself into a state of withdrawal and isolation from everyone.
So you wonder what made me so grim and sad. This morning I was still feeling relatively cheerful because I was so glad that I finally got out of my awkward OG (awkward only for me can?) and into a new, and hopefully better, class. Well, all the OG activities and bonding did stop, but my class (in general, no specific discomforts) felt even worse than my OG teammates.

Now I see why they say that your OG teammates might be the people that you are closest to next to your secondary school friends.

In case anyone from my class is reading this, I am so sorry guys, I am born like that. I can't adapt well to changes, nor am I one of those extremely sociable and sunny people around new people that I have never seen before in my life and feel tremendously afraid of. After I knew my class allocation, I was really just like, let me die, let me die, someone please tell me this is a nightmare!

I never thought I will say this, but Oh GOD! I miss my OG teammates so much that it has become this weird achy feeling that gnaws at me, chanting, "We can't go back! We can't go back! No going back!" You can imagine how bad it is for me to re-adapt again to a new group of people just when I got over my initial apprehension of my OG teammates. I think I have been put under so much emotional stress these days from meeting new people, trying to know who they are and all. 

In fact, it was such a shaking experience for me that I almost even missed the "Empty Vessel" in my OG as I so aptly name him, because he was so noisy and irritating and all, but oh my, I would do anything for a bit of the noise today. In fact, I won't even mind if he decided to take his revenge and dump water on everyone, so long as I could stay in my OG. At the hindsight, everyone (mainly the boys, because I don't know them and hence see no faults) was so darn awesome in my OG. I can't believe that I am wishing that Zhi Yu, Johrathon, Daoming, Miselle, Claire and of course Delphine to all be in my class. I was so fond of Miselle and Claire because we had gotten pretty close in the few days and I really really liked them both, and guess what? Miselle and Claire are in the SAME class! Omg, I would do anything to be in their class!

Too bad, if wishes were horses, beggars would ride.

To be fair, there is this one person in my class that I am getting really fond of, because she is not loud or pushy, and basically she doesn't do anything that annoys me. In fact okay, I like this other person too, called Tan Min, I think? She is very friendly and sweet during the dance today which I screwed up (duh). Okay okay, I guess the one from Zhong Hwa (sorry if spelt wrongly) is pretty okay too, because I like the way she handles things, it makes me feel like I can just silently retreat to the back and make myself invisible.

I met Leon during one of the games, and I was all like, "How is your CT group?" and he said that they are pretty good. I found it hard to believe because, well, Leon is one of the really kind people who has no complains of anything even if that thing is killing him. Then I told him that I didn't feel very good in my class, and he was like,"You go appeal to change classes lar!" and I was asking how, and he said I just had to tell my CT teacher. But I didn't want to do that because she was so sweet and I was afraid that her feelings would be hurt and Leon was funny, saying, "WHO CARES?" Haha, awesome Leon is awesome.

Why can't I have Leon in my class eh? Rawr.
Okay, let's not be greedy and ask for Leon to be in my class, let's say that any of the below people would actually do (Names are all in codes):
  • Nubbi
  • Atom
  • BL
  • YK Cheryl
Yet, none of them are.

Sad.

This is so damn freaking sad.

Oh and I can't of promised myself that I would stop saying "Damn" and "Shit" because one morning, I woke up and realized that those two words sound pretty crude. 

So before I get all suicidal about my class, I tried my best to comfort myself in a variety of ways, which includes no less than, optimism, optimism and more optimism.

Optimism is so rare in me that if I were a glass and optimism were water, you have to tilt the glass to see even one drop of it.

So here are the fruits of my optimism:
  • It could have been worse. While I didn't get any good friends in my class, I could have gotten primary school classmates that I disliked/hated in my class, and for that, I shall be superbly grateful.
  • Only 3 guys in my class which is pretty okay apart from the fact that I actually don't really like females because since primary school, I was under the impression that girls love to clique together and talk about others. I like to clique with people I like and talk, but with strangers, erm...a bit awkward. But then too many boys are troublesome too, I have no idea why, my subconsciousness says it.
  • If I don't like/have anyone in my class, it means that I have less of an obligation to feel all warm and homey with them all, and that means that I can focus on the real important task on hand, my exams which is the most important, isn't it?
  • Since Fate has arranged for me to be in this class, there must be a meaning for it. Maybe I should consider outcasting myself so that I can be independent and undistracted like HQ. Though I am not as brilliant as her, I do think that I can still stay afloat. 
I know that there are a few more arguments I had with myself to make myself better, but I can't remember those, so too bad.

And you think that my mom would be sympathetic. She was all neutral and went like, "You can't choose everything in life." instead of listening to me wail about my day. Next time when she complains about not striking the lottery, I am going to return the phrase to her, hehe.

I WANT MY OG TEAMMATES!

Oh-my-god, I feel so sorry for myself.

Okay Okay I shall not think about it.

Rawr my sprained toe hurts so bad, and I feel feverish and sick.

Btw, just as I was starting to miss my OG people, I saw all their Whatsapp messages, and apparently they don't like their CT classes too, but then as usual, I always get daoed on my Whatsapp messages, so I was slightly less fond of them as I imagined myself to be. (This sentence is really convoluted but I really can't be bothered haha.) They were all like, "I MISS MY OG!!!" which I sort of agreed with till I remembered that I was transparent in my group. Okay it was not just me, it was really this group of us who don't hobo on our whatsapp 24/7, which included:
  • Me
  • Miselle
  • Dol
  • Claire
  • Shannen
RAWR I WANT MISELLE, DOL, CLAIRE AND SHANNEN IN MY CLASS! They are such sweet, quiet and lovely people. Tsk. But on the brighter side, I do like this classmate of mine that lives in Clementi, she is super sweet and nice. :3

Orientation Day 3 (Yesterday)
Weather: Heavy Downpour, is this a good sign?
Mood: Pretty wonderful.

Ha, now I am laughing at how I was full of grumbles of yesterday.

Maybe if I had blogged about yesterday yesterday,  then I would have been so much more whiny. Now I have truly understood the phrase, "Don't start to appreciate something only after you have lost it." I would in fact do anything for yesterday to come back, but too bad, unlike Harry Potter, history, or good history, at least, does not repeat itself. Bad ones have the uncanny ability to do so though, strange.

Yesterday was really quite fun actually. Like usual we had all the games and stuff which were boring compared to Day 2 games, but still play nevertheless if I look past all the times I volunteered (because nobody else did) and embarrassed myself. Now you see why I have so much reservations about volunteering myself at games.

SODACHE yesterday was the best out of the three days because I had an awesome dance partner who was totally non-awkward and so I was non-awkward. He was generous because the first time we were supposed to Hi-Ten each other, I was zoning out into my own world and didn't noticed, so his hands that were held out went unnoticed. So bad of me right, and so awkward for him. Luckily, I noticed it and apologized for spacing out and he was like, "No it's alright." (sounds like Phie is channeling her energy into some other people!)

And unlike the other people, he actually bother to hold your hands properly which make it non-awkward because if you are one of those guys that go like: hands out, hands in, hands out again uncertainly, finally decided not to offer your partner hands/ hold the tip of her finger like she has some germs or something, then you are actually making everything awkward.

I think at some point of time, I vaguely recalled hitting someone hard in the chest because of my flailing tentacles, and I was asking him if it was him that I hit, and he said no, don't worry, it wasn't. But then again, you can't be sure because he might be saying that out of pure kindness of his heart.

My partner name? Eh? Uh....Oh shucks I really don't know. Oops. I will try to do a Facebook Roll later to see if I can find. But come to think of it, I can't even remember the face, oh-my.
[Update: I just did a Facebook roll and the person should be called Nicholas if I am not wrong.]

We had games together as an OG9 till 6.40 pm yesterday before going out for dinner at Bukit Timah Plaza at an Italian Restaurant. The "Murderer" Game, Round 2, was AWESOME partially because I was one of the murderers and I managed to kill a good amount of people before I was caught by the detective.

I am amazed at my own discreet skills of murdering. 

One way to be a good murderer is to always look surprised and scared when someone dies, so that nobody gets suspicious of your stoic face. Also, you can't look tense while killing people or it would be a big giveaway. If you held hands in front, then DON'T squeeze too hard or it is bloody obvious that you are killing people. Oh yes, and one more skill is that you can always look at each and everyone of the players' held hands, as though trying to figure out where the squeezes are coming from. :D

That game was so fun.

After that we played "MRT" which is not a very good game for me, because I already told you guys that I have poor memory and poor me had to remember my own station on top of everyone else's, so I ended up forgetting everything and getting slapped on my legs A LOT

In the first round, I was wondering why everyone was picking ulu MRT stations so brilliant me decided that I had to be smart, and to be different, so I picked ORCHARD. That turned out bad because Orchard is so easy to remember and whenever I am zoning off by myself, people will go "ORCHARD!!!!

I will kindly count for you the number of seconds for me to respond:
  • 2 seconds to realize that MY station is being called
  • 4 seconds of absolute confusion and blank memory
  • 2 seconds of having nothing but the word "ORCHARD!" in my head
  • 3 seconds to think of a station to call out
YES. SO I GET WHACKED FOR 11 SECONDS BEFORE THE WHACKING STOPS. I had blood clots on my legs from all the whacking, tsk.

And the point is, despite all my efforts to remember one single station, the moment my station is called, my mind goes BLANK and I can't think of anything because I am panicking and my whole head is like:

Orchard.
Orchard.
Orchard.
Orchard.
Orchard.
Orchard.
Orchard.

I remember this once, I shouted out "Chinese Garden" or "Chinatown" (I was so sure that someone could have been that station) and everyone was like "HUH? THERE IS NO SUCH STATION!" before they burst out laughing and went back to whacking me on the legs. That was pretty embarrassing in a funny way.

The second round, I became smart, so I chose "Somerset". But everyone was smarter and they remember stations that were WAY more obscure, like:
  • Nicole Highway (or something)
  • One-North
  • HAR PAR VILLA (HAHA I LOVE CALLING THIS!!!)
  • 2-South (or something)
Okay so in the end I got whacked a lot...

Afterwards we went for our OG Dinner at Bukit Timah Plaza, it was raining very heavily and most of the boys ran in the rain to the plaza, while two of them were laughed at because they used umbrellas. Personally I didn't see anything wrong with umbrellas, but I guess the society nowadays is all about jumping on the bandwagon and being identical copies of each other so as not to stand out.

We went to this Italian restaurant called Seiziriya or something, can't remember so well, and the food there is pretty okay, except that it makes you full VERY easily. I had this small platter of baked rice with bacon and pineapple and I almost couldn't finish it.

I like the sofa seats, it was so comfortable that I was almost nodding off after the meal, but then I guess that would make me look like the anti-social person that I actually am, so I keep texting Phie and praying that she would text back quickly so that I have something to occupy me with.

Oh yes, by the way, I sat beside Nigel or somethingone (he kept calling himself zhiyu, which made me all puzzled as to why someone would go for a Chinese name when you can be called so comfortably as Nigel).

Out of common politeness, he asked for my name when I was texting, so I promptly forgot what it was that I wanted to type while replying, and out of common politeness to (since I already said I cannot remember names) I asked back, and he said his Chinese name and he told me he was the OGR which I was like *tried to think very hard* and went like "Oh yeah yes you were, right right." without really remembering.

I guess I sounded really fu2yan3. 

Later out of politeness again, I asked if his subcom was PCME (aren't guys are all like PCME) and he was like "No no! Bio!" and I suddenly remembered that he was the one who asked the boys to girls ratio in Bio and people were like 6:17 and he was so happy because he can change one girlfriend for everyday of the week. Funny joke, but...

Boys. T__T

You would think that they should be worried about passing Promos and stuff like I am (fyi, my whole mind is all "PASS EXAMS PASS EXAMS!" everyday) and all they care is to have fun while they can.

Oh yes, and apparently my poor memory enabled me to ask that same person if he was from HCI and he was like *shake head shake head* and Dol was like, "He is from Maris Stella lar you." and I remembered that I actually did remember seeing someone in bright yellow Maris Stella shirt in my group, but had no idea that it was him.

Why do all the boys look all the same eh? QAQ

The boys had fun mixing this disgusting drink where they mixed in ALL AVAILABLE drinks along with chilli sauce, coffee, grated cheese, chilli flakes and all and I was happily laughing at the people drinking it, till I lost the game and...

WHAMMM!

I had to drink it.

Oh.
My.
God.

Admittedly, the taste wasn't the worse thing, but the smell was so gross and pungent and repulsive that before I even took a sip, I wanted to die from the smell. That was the worst thing ever, and I bet all the girls and the BOYS were feeling sorry that I had to drink it, because they were all shouting random bits of advice like:
  • Don't smell it!
  • Drink through the straw!
  • Just a small sip will do!
  • Hold your breath.
I was partly more scared if I drank it, I may throw up on the table or something, so I asked if everyone could just turned their backs on me, but I guess they are afraid that I won't drink it, so they adamantly refused to, and stared like:


Till I took a small sip and YAY finally ordeal over.

Side effects of the drink: I felt confused and disoriented for the next 10 minutes and couldn't remember where I was and who I was.


Afterwards, some more things happened and I left early with Dol and Miselle, right after Claire left. Quite fun a day, and if I knew what was coming to me on CT grouping day, I would have cheerfully drank more of the disgusting concoction so long as I could stay in my OG (even if I am pretty invisible, but I am used to being invisible, so that doesn't affect me).

Okay admittedly, there were A LOT OF embarrassing moments, but I happily told myself that no one remembers me anyway, so who cares? Maybe after two months or something, I see a OG person from my group without knowing that he is from my OG and we happily talk like:

"HI!"
"What OG are you from?"
"Oh I am from OG9!"
"Really? Me too!"
"Hey how come I don't remember you?"
"Oh I was under my invisibility cloak all the time!"

Awesome.

So I won't exactly worry about my worries till they are worth me worrying.

Orientation Day 2
Day 2 wasn't a good day, mainly because my partner and I were so fail at SODACHE that it was embarrassing and terrible.

I can't remember much about others, so skip skip!

*end of post, haha!*

Orientation

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Weather: So-freakin-warm-I-am-going-to-evaporate kind of hot, or is it just me?
Mood: Extremely tired, and suffering from post-embarassment-disorder 

At first I was going to name this post as Ohana or something, but then I decided against it, because it might be a little too obvious, yeah? Haha, this is a little self-contradictory since I mentioned it already anyway, but I always think that leaving the title out is a sure sign of smartness, wahahaha. 

Initially, the orientation was quite boring, but it was twice more fun after separating into our Orientation Groups (not to mention 10 times more awkward and embarrassing). I was so relieved to have my awesome friend, Dol, in my OG because she is like my favorite person in NY next to Phiephie, partly because she is so funny, heh.

In order to not bore everyone out, I won't go through all the boring things in the morning, but skip straight to the OG bonding and games part, kay?

I remember the first OG game we had to do was to introduce yourself with your name, school and hobby ( I KNEW it! Each year I have to cook up some hobby just for the sake of this) and play double-whacko.

Poor me, as you all know, the only thing with a memory poorer than me is a goldfish, and mind you, goldfish can remember things for 3 seconds and I can't even do one! Poor me, poor poor me trying to cram all the confusing names like Sean, Shannon, Jia Hui...uh I can't remember anymore, so sorry.

So in the first round, I was Dol's guard, meaning that if someone calls her name, I would have to call out someone's name before Dol gets whacked and consequently gets turned into the whacker. I tried to remember one easiest name by chanting and chanting the name over and over again in my head, so much so that I didn't hear Dol's name getting called out and Dol ended up being whacker despite all my precautions. T_T

I was actually for once proud of my obscure Chinese name and the lack of an English name because Whacko-games always go for those easy English names to call, so if you are one of the Tom, Dick and Harrys, beware! I wasn't even called once during the whole game, so I was all chilled there thinking about what to eat for dinner till my OGL told us to end the game and have nothing less than a SECOND round of introduction.

She made all the guys lined up in one line and all the girls line up in one line, face each other and talk to the person in front of yourself for 30 seconds. After that, the guys shuffle forward to errr...get to know the next person.

Mine went something like that:

1st person
Him: Hello! I am =name!! I cannot remember names!=
Me: Hi! I am YY (name shortened for my own privacy).
Him: What subject combi are you taking?
Me: BCM-lit, you?
Him: BCME! What cca were you from?
Me: ES (English Society). You?
Him: Soccer (or something, pardon me, I cannot remember a thing to save my life.)

*30 seconds up, ding ding!*

2nd person
This person is awesome, he can keep up a conversation by himself really well, so all I had to do was to be interested, look interested, smile, nod and look impressed. *beams happily* (okay, our OGL just added us to our OG group, and the person is Ming (shortened name for privacy sake))

Him: Hello! I am .... you are?
Me: Hey, I am YY.
Him: Your subject combi is BCM-lit right? I heard.
Me: *me thinks: awesome, no more repeats!* Yep that's right, you?
Him: PCME! What cca were you from?
Me: *balks* ES (English Society). You?
Him:Oh! Same as this person here! *points to Dol*
Me: Yup that's correct, your CCA?
Him: (okay now I think he is the soccer person) Soccer! We already began training, what CCA do you plan to join?
Me: Shooting? But I find the training a bit hectic.
Him: *More about soccer etc etc* I am from HCI HP.....
Me: Wow that's impressive, HP isn't easy...
Him: No no HCI HP is quite easy, NY HP is hard, and HCJC HP is hard....

*Okay, a non-awkward 2nd conversation, love it.*

3rd PersonJust when I thought that maybe this kind of intro won't be so bad if the boys do all the talking, I came to a very shy person.

Him: *stones and stares*
Me: Eh, hi!
Him: *quietly* Hi.
Me: Your name?
Him: *soft* Sean.
Me: *cannot hear* Sorry?
Him: *a teeny-weee louder* Sean.
Me: *still didn't hear* I beg your pardon?
Him: *loudest possible for him* Sean!
Me: Oh, okay, I am YY.
Him: *nods*......*stares*
Me: What CCA are you from?
Him: Maths Club.
Me: Wow you must be really smart!
Him: *shakes head demurely*
Me: Subject combi?
Him: PCME.
Me: *kicks myself for asking an obvious question like that* Oh cool! I am BCM-lit.
Him: *looks vaguely interested*
Me: *awkward silence*
Him: *stares at me comfortably*
Me: *tries to stare back, fail after 3 seconds and burst out laughing, turned to Dol* What do I do?
Dol: It's okay, don't laugh (she was laughing hysterically herself kay!)

*end of super awkward 3rd conversation*

Okay, I joined Dol in her conversations and apparently, she was interrogating her partner. I heard something like:

"What is your religious stand?"

..... .....

"Del! Are you going to ask 'What are your political views?" next?" I laughed at Dol's question.

Suddenly, in front of two guys, without any warning, Dol burst out:

"I THINK RAPISTS SHOULD BE CASTRATED!!!"

*shocked, awkward silence. shuffle feet, shuffle feet*

Dol might have been possessed when she said that because the next moment when she noticed what she just said, she hid herself behind my back in this fit of helpless laughter. I was laughing so hard at her sudden outburst demanding for rapists to be castrated that I was doubled over, so we had our respective partners looking at us like we just grew an extra head.

I have to say, I love Dol so much because she is so terribly funny and amusing and she makes every moment of awkward-ness more cheerful! <3

Okay that is until she told me that this one person looked like Ip Man (Donnie Yen) and I was like, "Where got? Okay a bit." and Dol promptly turned to the person and went like, "My friend *points at me* says you look like Ip Man. You know Donnie Yen?" I was like !??!!?! What did I do kind of face and went indignantly, "HEY I DID NOT SAY THAT!" But then, BAMMMM! Impression spoilt. Now I am probably a judgemental person with no courage to own up to what I say in that person's mind. Poor soul who looked like Donnie Yen looked so confused and surprised because he was told that he looked like Donnie Yen by Dol. HAHAHAS, come to think of it, it is damn funny.

Okays then after that we joined OG10 for a game of squirrel and trees. Basically a two persons (allocated) form a tree, and an allocated squirrel lives inside. If the gamemaster shouts: "FIRE!", then trees run away and form new trees, squirrels stay. At the shout of "HUNTER!!", squirrels run and trees stay. At the shout of "earthquake!!", everyone runs for new formation, though squirrels always stay as squirrels and trees as trees.

This game was relatively okay, and at this one point, one funny guy came up to me and said, "You are a tree right? Good, I am a tree too! So all we need is a squirrel!" cheerfully, and he threw out an arm and scooped a squirrel out from thin air. He then pushed the squirrel down and made the tree over the relatively-zen squirrel.

I met Shuen during the small break, and good golly, she was as pink as a tomato! I think her face was badly sun burnt already and she happily showed me her watch tan which she got from staying out in the sun the entire day some time ago. By then, my face was boiling from the afternoon sun and we all went to the washroom to chill after ponning the catching game.

Afterwards, we had this bounce-catching game (I named it myself hehe) where everyone stood in pairs and the game commences with one runner and one catcher, and the runner will run to a pair and bounce one person out, and the person bounced out becomes the new runner whom the catcher has to catch. Okay I will assume everyone knows this so I shan't explain further.

I was actually in a very zen and somewhat comtemplative mood because during the squirrel game, one of my OG mates that I didn't really know asked me, "Are you a blogger?" and I was like stunned for a moment, before going, "Huh?" and she said, "You have a blog right?"

I told her "Yeah I did had a blog, never had the impression that anyone read it." and suddenly she and Dol were telling me that my blog is actually read by half the Nanyang and Hwachong population and I was like *shocked, shell-shocked* I almost considered closing the blog for a second, tbph.

After the amazement of hearing that people actually bothers to read my blog wore off, I immediately started to worry about things like, "Oh no, maybe some of my posts are really mean." and "I bet I have tons of anti-fans." and "What, I don't believe it, they are just trying to be nice :3"

Okay back to the bounce-catching game, I was thinking about my blog and zenning by myself, when I got bounced out from my place THREE times. Each time it took me 15 seconds or more to realized that hey, omg I have been bounced out!!! Before I started running around like some crazy person in a desperation to catch the runner/escape the catcher.

Only once did I noticed the runner running towards me at full speed and the moment he came to my partner, I took off (feels proud of my fast reflexes) and ran around a bit before going back to the same partner. Heee, coincidence, really.

Okay, the game ended and here comes the highlight of the day.

DANCE
You know that I can't dance. I have 6 left legs, no right legs and probably have tentacles instead of arms, and this dance was like had to be boy-and-girl.

Awkwardness aside, there are more awkwardness.

I mean my dance partner (oh no, I can't remember the name again!) was really nice and kind and in fact AWESOME because he seemed to minimalize his movements like I did, which is great because I won't face pressure of having to dance with all my extra limbs. But it doesn't help with the fact that I was dead awkward, and at the same time guilty because Dol was trying so hard while I just kept looking confused and thunderous at some points.

Okay, you know the butt-jerking dance moves? I tried to sway as little as possible (so there was this funny side-to-side swaying) and my partner just stood there, ramrod straight with an unreadable expression on his face. I think Wennie's dark aura might have floated over to me because I felt increasingly frustrated, gahhh.

And then again there was this arm twisting dance step that I was too afraid to do because I was afraid of twisting my arms out and each time we arrived at that move, I will promptly try to skip doing that step by looking confused and blur (and feeling them too, mind you!). So the dance conversation went like that:

Partner: Okay, okay, you have to turn this way.
Me: Okay. *turns wrong way anyway*
Partner: No no no the other way.
Me: Oh sorry. *turns again*
Partner: Okay now you turn all the way.
Me: *turns halfway*
Partner: No no no, you have to end up facing me!
Me: *feels thoroughly depressed by my own fail dance* Okay. *turns again*

Finally got it right. =___= After the first round of trauma:

Me: I am so sorry about that!
Partner: It's okay~~!

Such patience. If I were to dance with myself, I would have thrown myself out of the window already. Haish.

There was also this one part where the Dance ICs were like, "GUYS HOLD OUT YOUR HANDS." But around me, no girl took the hands (most didn't hold out), so I didn't take the hands either. Poor partner stood there with his hands out for 1 min- 2 min or so.

After the entire session of failed twirling and aching legs, Dol and I met with Phie to recount our embarrassing experiences. Dol kept telling me that I should be happy with my dance partner (which I was, in case you are wondering), because according to her, "He is so cute in the face."

I told Dol that he was so tall that most of the time I stared at his PE shirt and tbh, because I am the socially awkward person I am, I didn't scrutinize his face.

Dol: BUT HE IS REALLY CUTE!
Me: Really? I didn't see.
Dol: YOU DIDN'T SEE? But...but he is quite good looking.
Me: Okadie. Which one is him again?
Dol: WHAT YOU DANCED WITH HIM FOR 1 HOUR OR SO AND NOT RECOGNIZE HID FACE?
Me: Well, he is tall, and all I saw was the Hwachong logo on the PE shirt.

Dol then started this super funny rant about her dance partner, who was the Shy Sean from earlier on. She kept saying that Sean must have been a genius or something because according to her, he is a little lagged in his responses so she postulated that he is probably formulating some cheem maths equations in his head, which got me and Phie laughing so hard.

Dol to me and Phie, "Do you know, my partner doesn't hold out his hands, so I have to reach over and grab his hands and then yank his arm up and then squeeze myself through the hole??"

Phie and I almost died from laughing at the look of outrage on her face.

Dol, "Sometimes I feel like pointing out to him that I am the girl here, hello!"

See, I told you that Dol is so funny!

Suddenly, Dol went like, "But he is actually quite cute lar." which made me laugh because I thought of her comparison of her partner to a teacher in NY.

I told Dol that apparently every guy looked cute to her, and it is not a bad thing, because she can see the good points people can't. :D

Dol suddenly turned to me and said, "Hey your partner is actually very nice to you!"

I was like Wh....at?

Dol continued, "At least he holds out his hands."

Me, "Yeah he is very kind. And patient."

Dol, "My partner expects me to hold out my hands!!!!"

Haha that was about it. Dol made some other jokes about the dance which me and Phie enjoyed totally, but I am too tired to write anymore. I shall go sleep already.

Nights all, and sorry about the abrupt ending hehe! :)